Changes have come fast and furious these last few weeks.
Some I’ve handled more beautifully than I imagined I would. Some have been rocky.
The Thursday before Christmas, the husband and I (and the dog daughter) moved into a new apartment. The days leading up to the move, I realized just how ungracious I can be surrounded by a tornado of stuff I’d rather just put in a closet and not address. Our belongings were in a state of upheaval, and my soul felt the same way, too.
It occurred to me how important “home” is to us. Especially for two individuals who love their space organized just so, being rooted somewhere is comforting. And just days away from Christmas, it didn’t seem like ideal timing. Then again, when is anything ever perfectly timed?
We packed. We recruited help. We moved.
And we love it!
In a matter of hours, this new apartment become “home.” And with some greenery on the door, the tree in place and big bulbs outlining our garage, it actually felt like it.
I prepped myself for the alternative, halfway thinking that our first married Christmas – in a new house as a young wife – would evoke neutral, borderline scary/sad feelings. I was so wrong. For some reason, an attitude of thankfulness came more naturally than I expected, and I wasn’t so locked into my traditions of the past that I couldn’t appreciate my own reality. Even if I did nearly recreate the same Christmas morning breakfast that I’ve had the past 21 years of my life. So what.
That’s not to say my expectations of this first Christmas – in a new home as a young wife – were all met. I expected to surpass my doubt and make some yeast rolls with ease. Rather, I curdled the buttermilk on the first attempt. I expected to wrap presents creatively and instead gave up trying to package a round candle and stuck it in a bag.
And the wonderful news is…that’s all ok.
It’s so easy to hold ourselves, our homes, our skills or spouses, for example, up to such high standards. Sometimes, we just need to allow ourselves to adapt to the new scenario in front of us. Give ourselves the chance to bend and flex as needed, and grace when things don’t go as planned. I don’t do that often enough.
My Christmas was one of deep change. A healthy, happy and somewhat challenging change. I hope you had a meaningful one this year with your family and friends. Shall we jump into 2014?